diff --git a/federationapi/queue/destinationqueue.go b/federationapi/queue/destinationqueue.go
index 51350916d..12e6db9fa 100644
--- a/federationapi/queue/destinationqueue.go
+++ b/federationapi/queue/destinationqueue.go
@@ -410,34 +410,49 @@ func (oq *destinationQueue) nextTransaction(
 	defer cancel()
 
 	relayServers := oq.statistics.KnownRelayServers()
-	if oq.statistics.AssumedOffline() && len(relayServers) > 0 {
-		sendMethod = statistics.SendViaRelay
-		relaySuccess := false
-		logrus.Infof("Sending to relay servers: %v", relayServers)
-		// TODO : how to pass through actual userID here?!?!?!?!
-		userID, userErr := gomatrixserverlib.NewUserID("@user:"+string(oq.destination), false)
-		if userErr != nil {
-			return userErr, sendMethod
-		}
-
-		// Attempt sending to each known relay server.
-		for _, relayServer := range relayServers {
-			_, relayErr := oq.client.P2PSendTransactionToRelay(ctx, *userID, t, relayServer)
-			if relayErr != nil {
-				err = relayErr
-			} else {
-				// If sending to one of the relay servers succeeds, consider the send successful.
-				relaySuccess = true
-			}
-		}
-
-		// Clear the error if sending to any of the relay servers succeeded.
-		if relaySuccess {
-			err = nil
-		}
-	} else {
+	hasRelayServers := len(relayServers) > 0
+	shouldSendToRelays := oq.statistics.AssumedOffline() && hasRelayServers
+	if !shouldSendToRelays {
 		sendMethod = statistics.SendDirect
 		_, err = oq.client.SendTransaction(ctx, t)
+	} else {
+		// Try sending directly to the destination first in case they came back online.
+		sendMethod = statistics.SendDirect
+		_, err = oq.client.SendTransaction(ctx, t)
+		if err != nil {
+			// The destination is still offline, try sending to relays.
+			sendMethod = statistics.SendViaRelay
+			relaySuccess := false
+			logrus.Infof("Sending %q to relay servers: %v", t.TransactionID, relayServers)
+			// TODO : how to pass through actual userID here?!?!?!?!
+			userID, userErr := gomatrixserverlib.NewUserID("@user:"+string(oq.destination), false)
+			if userErr != nil {
+				return userErr, sendMethod
+			}
+
+			// Attempt sending to each known relay server.
+			for _, relayServer := range relayServers {
+				_, relayErr := oq.client.P2PSendTransactionToRelay(ctx, *userID, t, relayServer)
+				if relayErr != nil {
+					err = relayErr
+				} else {
+					// If sending to one of the relay servers succeeds, consider the send successful.
+					relaySuccess = true
+
+					// TODO : what about if the dest comes back online but can't see their relay?
+					// How do I sync with the dest in that case?
+					// Should change the database to have a "relay success" flag on events and if
+					// I see the node back online, maybe directly send through the backlog of events
+					// with "relay success"... could lead to duplicate events, but only those that
+					// I sent. And will lead to a much more consistent experience.
+				}
+			}
+
+			// Clear the error if sending to any of the relay servers succeeded.
+			if relaySuccess {
+				err = nil
+			}
+		}
 	}
 	switch errResponse := err.(type) {
 	case nil:
diff --git a/federationapi/statistics/statistics.go b/federationapi/statistics/statistics.go
index 866c09336..e29e3b140 100644
--- a/federationapi/statistics/statistics.go
+++ b/federationapi/statistics/statistics.go
@@ -164,6 +164,8 @@ func (s *ServerStatistics) Success(method SendMethod) {
 				logrus.WithError(err).Errorf("Failed to remove %q from blacklist", s.serverName)
 			}
 		}
+
+		s.removeAssumedOffline()
 	}
 }
 
diff --git a/setup/config/config_federationapi.go b/setup/config/config_federationapi.go
index 6c198018d..cd7d90562 100644
--- a/setup/config/config_federationapi.go
+++ b/setup/config/config_federationapi.go
@@ -49,7 +49,7 @@ func (c *FederationAPI) Defaults(opts DefaultOpts) {
 		c.Database.Defaults(10)
 	}
 	c.FederationMaxRetries = 16
-	c.P2PFederationRetriesUntilAssumedOffline = 2
+	c.P2PFederationRetriesUntilAssumedOffline = 1
 	c.DisableTLSValidation = false
 	c.DisableHTTPKeepalives = false
 	if opts.Generate {